***
3pm in afternoon class about Perception and Coordination, i gagged myself from bursting out my impatience for a 15 minute break. Why can we just Bring it on!
and Go Home! 1 month, i haven't seen my parents and my siblings. I m afraid that i'll turn into a schizophrenic if i will not see them any soon..
***
"I came home, hoping sanity will possess my body. But no..."
***
The class ended 4:30, with satisfying quiz results, I sprang from my seat, flirted a little with Khinnet and Mayee, and bid farewell to my crush's dead attention..(is there such thing?)
The Jaro Liko Tagbak Terminal jeepney did not show up, consuming the delicate time left there in for me to board the HPQ bus-- the only busline that enters Concepcion. So i rode my broom...
just kidding..
The secrecy of the wizarding world is at stake in that matter.
***
Going Back... my mind is not in its adequate functioning right now.. i really hope i could finish this...
After series of uncozy, and willing offers of the evening's invisible dusts to powder-coat my face powered by the bus's own law of motion.. I gave in, just so i can reunite with my family- my Mama Connie and Papa Jimmy.
***
My mama got angry with me..
with all the expenses I've cost her..
What i'll do here is some sort of defending myself...
In everyday that I live in Iloilo City, in every academic battle for learning and being equipped for the future, part of my every day, where i do not consider my self living at all.. only existing! --- is the crisis of financial sickness..
***
I published this post before pa, and I examine it for some revisions, and additions that might make it, dapper and spicy.. ohh.. or when grammar alert comes in the way.. Since sometimes, I cannot bang all the ideas to the blog in just one confrontation, I leave it hanging and published until an emotional baggage burdens my back. and some unloading is required.
its 4am, and later, I will be on duty at OR... and, whilst I increase the risk of my tanga-tanga sa hangin and lost-lost drama karun, i will try to finish what I started.
***
8th Feb@Bed
Sacrifices come Success..
I believe in that, although, I am most utterly bewildered on my own concept of Success.
Everything keeps improving, there is continuous growth of curiosity and increasing standards of satisfaction.. You can never know what you want.. or never get to choose because of what you don't have...
If you a have a 20 Philippine Peso... What shall you do?
a. Buy soda (Coca Cola) worth 16 peso for large.
b. Buy two crispy Dumangas bread for 7 peso each.
c. Keep the money and reserved for tomorrow's expenses.
The condition is lacking.. I forgot to say I'm hungry.
I do this three choices often...
A and B tells you, how important it is for me to attend my hunger.
Coke signifies satisfaction. Bread signifies nourishment and keeping the money is my own way of preparing for the future, even though im hungry..now that is sacrifice.
***
Now, my typical cityhood life is with these three: SNS
Satisfaction
Nourishment
Sacrifice
Satisfaction, can either way be stated as Contentment, because satisfaction denotes different connotation to every reader.
My SATiSFACTION aspect consists
- my academic pursuit for excellence and learning
- my own fulfillment for receiving remarks and performing good at school.
- the improvement of my craft
- and alliance to the friends and families.
My NOURiSHMENT aspect consists
- mostly desire to be healthy. (Just last Uweek, i proved that I'm not because I was not accepted for blood donation)
- to meet my esteem needs
- the nourishment of my spiritual and emotional health. (random, whatever comes out of my mind)
My SACRiFiCE aspect consists
- staying in the city, cant barely go home.
- missing your family
- missing your siblings
- conserving your money for tomorrow or till the allowance day
- eating twice a day because thrice will be an expense
- staying in with a nocturnal animal.. (not now!)
- studying every night.
- etc.
***
Why am i putting it all in here?
today, its 11th of Feb, and the post was 6 days ago. oh yeah!
If you know me already, you never have to think twice about blaming it on school loads.
I am a student nurse, genetically-modified-by-experience-to stay up late and ignore the luxury of sleep a comfortable bed can offer.
I still remember the carefree days of highschool, and now i can hardly swallow the overwhelming transformation college have imposed on me. Most of them are good, and im happy knowing people with beautiful souls, who influenced me greatly and contributed to my personality development. For me, everyday is soul-searching.
Trying to look for fragments that will complete my whole being. Meeting people along the way, learning things of immense value, knowing ideas from fewer great minds and identifying sensibility in the impaired.
I began to wander what my past life was.. if ever that is true... If i was liberated like pigeon, or keen as a meerkat.
(Now im starting to think outside of the box)
***
Trying to look for fragments that will complete my whole being. Meeting people along the way, learning things of immense value, knowing ideas from fewer great minds and identifying sensibility in the impaired.
I began to wander what my past life was.. if ever that is true... If i was liberated like pigeon, or keen as a meerkat.
(Now im starting to think outside of the box)
***
when i arrived at Iloilo City way back in 2009, every scenery i see , reminds me of how promising my college life is going to be, and i kept that thought just until i discovered the horrors of living in the same room with a nocturnal animal .. (forgive my brutality)
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